No New Year's Resolutions this Year!
No, I am not the grinch. I just don't believe resolutions are what we need this year or any year for that matter. I believe New Year's Resolutions could be harmful to our mental health. Let's talk about it.
Why harmful? Because they set us up as human “doers” to self- evaluate instead of self accept. We spend so much of our lives being evaluated with external standards of being “ good enough. Therapists like myself try to help people unlearn these standards.
Imagine how it would feel to enter a new year with complete self acceptance and unconditional love for ourselves and others. Resolutions set us up to measure up & not accept where we are.
If only everyone could see themselves as valuable and valued right now TODAY, just as we are, I believe we would all face the year in a better frame of mind.
Imagine how it would feel to enter a new year with complete self acceptance and unconditional love for ourselves and others?
Kids would feel better about themselves and not feel depressed over their inadequacies because they aren’t excelling in school or can't be with their friends. Adults who measure their worth in salary and economic position would see themselves as equally important to everyone else (2020 eroded that for many). We might just achieve a greater sense of equity if we let go of standards to measure our self- worth. Know that you are enough.
Painting by Lark Pilinsky
If 2020 has taught us anything, it’s the value of life itself. Period. Living unconditionally, living each moment, present and grateful have been the gifts of this time in our lives. So why not enter 2021 thinking differently...
Let’s make our new resolution to let go of resolutions to change and instead resolve to love and accept ourselves and others as we are today.
I don’t mean we don’t need to improve ourselves but based on our own choices. Bend not to external cultural pressures to “become” instead of discovering our own innate awesomeness! So my wish for everyone is to reflect on this one thought, you are good!
We can improve ourselves based on our own choices, not an external cultural pressure!
Do you know and believe you are as awesome as you are? Start there and know that the person in the mirror is powerful just because you exist. In 2021, be your most awesome self while accepting yourself and others as gifts to the world.
At midnight on the 31st, take a wonderful deep breath and be present in a marvelous reflection of how much the world needs you as you are.
Happy New Year and Beyond!
Painting by Lark Larisa Pilinsky arenas throughout our lives. Grief is complicated, complex and a highly personal process unique for each individual. Asking these questions can support you in developing your own approach to loss in your own life as they have helped me in mine.
Painting by Lark Pilinsky